Coping with Infidelity

Infidelity is a painful ordeal that affects over half of married couples in the US. Many women have compared extra marital affairs with the pain of being abused, raped, or even kidnapped – and they have said that the affair is worse.

There are ways to cope with the pain of infidelity, and you can move on with your life – you can recover. The following are tips, words of advice from men and woman who have dealt with their husbands and wives having affairs with neighbors, friends, co-workers, or someone else entirely. The following have helped them move past the incident in their lives, and hopefully this will help you, too.

• Take Time For Yourself – Take time for yourself – pamper you! Go shopping, golfing, to a spa or get a facial. Take a little bit of time for yourself. Many people who have had a spouse cheat on them feel unworthy, abused, and unloved. Make yourself feel good – go buy something that looks great on you, go dancing or out with friends, just do something that make you feel good about you as a person.
• Talk to Your Partner – It may hurt, but you need to talk with your spouse and create an understanding between you two. Put aside your anger, your jealousy, and your fear – discuss what went wrong with the relationship, and what you’re willing to do to make it right. There will no doubt be a great many painful conversations involved with this, but you need to try – if you two decide not to work it out, it is still good to receive a level of closure with this. If you do wish to attempt to work it out, counseling and long discussions would be a great deal of help – a balm to your wounds, so you might say.
• Take Up Relaxation – Take up something like meditation, or take a yoga class – learning to relax, to empty your head and your heart, would help you feel less anxiety, stress, and anger towards the situation, and it would help you move on towards something better, be it with someone else, with your partner, or with yourself. You can learn to love again, love yourself, and others, and you can trust again.
• Get Out of The House – Get out! Go out with friends, go shopping, dancing, even traveling. Don’t coop yourself up and feel depressed, because that’s not going to help you, or anyone around you. Being active, especially with others, is healthy and fun. Even going to the gym will make you feel good – exercise creates endorphins, and endorphins make you happier. So go on and get out of the house and have a good time.
• Don’t Dwell – Thinking about the affair your spouse had again and again will tear you up, from the inside out. Don’t dwell on what happened – instead, only think about it when it is time, like in counseling, or when you and your spouse are discussing it. Dwelling on it will only hurt you.


You can recover from this, and you can feel good about yourself again, learning to trust and love yourself, your spouse, or even someone new, if that is the route you wish to take. Just remember that it will take time to recover from the pain, and you may never completely get over the situation.